Can we be real for a second? January and February can be rough for anyone without cancer. With cancer? The snow, the short days, grey sky and the inability to go outside can drive us mad. It's too much.
If you're struggling right now, you're not alone. Winter is legitimately harder when you're fighting cancer.
Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is real, and it affects way more people than you'd think. Less sunlight messes with your serotonin and melatonin levels, which basically means your brain chemistry is working against you. Living in Portland, Oregon, we face this a lot with all the rain... so I get it more than you know!
Combine that with cancer fatigue, crazy treatment schedules, a compromised immune system that makes you nervous about going out, and the emotional weight of everything you're carrying? It's not just hard. It's brutal.
You're not weak for feeling this. You're human. That's why Fighting Pretty is here to help.
Cancer Hacks for Boosting Your Mood
Here's what's been helping me get through these tough months:
1. Embrace the cozy.
Winter doesn't have to be something you just survive. Make it cozy on purpose. Get yourself a soft blanket you love or a candle that smell amazing. (My new favorite is Good Sunset from GoodOlFactory - it smells amazing!).
2. Fight the grey with color.
When the world outside is so dull, fight back with brightness! Going through certain cancer treatments can also make your skin look pale, or even losing your eyebrows and eyelashes takes color away from your face. My go-to is always adding some bright lipstick like hot pink or red (perfect for upcoming Valentine's Day!). And be sure to check out our Limited Edition Fighting Pretty Liquid Matte Lipstick that is paraben free and feels like a dream. (sorry for the hard sell, but I love it!).
If you're not into lipstick, try a bright nail polish, some fun earrings, a fabulous headscarf or neckscarf or even just a cheerful phone wallpaper background! These tiny pops of color are like little mood boosters throughout your day.
3. Treat yourself.
No one deserves to be pampered more than you. And sometimes just making yourself a yummy hot chocolate in your favorite mug with way too much whipped cream is just the trick. Or, make a mocktail and pour it into a champagne glass or wine glass. Do something that makes you feel beautiful and treat yo-self sister!
4. Take some Vitamin D, but make it doctor-approved.
One thing I have been taking since I moved to Oregon, is Vitamin D. We have a lack of sunlight out here in the Northwest, so when it's winter, it feels SO DRAB. Before you start taking any vitamin, be sure to ask your oncologist about vitamin D supplements, but if it's ok. Do it!
5. Every day can be your own celebration.
Did you just finish a type of treatment? Just find out you got some good news? Experience a day with little side effects? Just survive for one more day? Or is it just a Tuesday and you need a reason to celebrate? Do it! Waking up every morning is a reason to celebrate, so have a pajama party! Gather with friends for pizza and wear sparkles! Create little moments to look forward to. And put them on your calendar. This helps us each get excited for what's to come and it helps us to avoid looking backward.
Stay connected even when you're home.
Sometimes you physically can't go out (immune system, weather, fatigue) and sometimes you just don't want to. Both are fair. But isolation is sneaky. It creeps in and makes everything harder. As a new mom, I'm facing this in a new way. But I remember experiencing this clearly when I was in the thick of my fight.
I am always greatful for virtual opportunities to connect, so here are some ideas to keep you feeling connected, even from home:
- Schedule regular video calls with your besties (even 15 minutes counts)
- Join our Fighting Pretty Conversation series that happen once a month! We have differnet speakers, and even send free gifts for those who attend!
- Join online support groups or communities (like our private Fight Club Community on Facebook!
- Chat with friends about what good shows are on... and watch them "together" and text about it real-time (Note: do not, I repeat, DO NOT watch shows that have death, cancer or hospital/sickness. Focus on positive, silly or mystery shows that have nothing to do with health!)
- Do a virtual coffee date or lunch date - I personally love "mocktail cocktail hour" where I can also slap on some lipstick and feel like I'm at a bar with my bestie while really just being home!
- Scroll and engage in social media when it feels good, but totally disengage when it doesn't - you don't need negativity in your life!
Give yourself permission to hibernate!
So, please listen to this one: it's okay to slow down right now.
If your social battery is at 2%, honor that. If getting through the day is your only accomplishment, that's enough. Some days that's all you can do and that's ok. Put yourself first and listen to your body.
Winter is hard. Cancer is hard. Winter + cancer is exponentially hard. You don't have to be productive or positive or "on" all the time. You just have to keep Fighting Pretty, one day at a time.
Some days, survival is the goal. And that's perfectly okay.
You're doing better than you think you are.
Sending you so much love each and every day, and know your friends at Fighting Pretty are here for you every step of the way! Spring is on it's way... just keep Fighting Pretty one day at a time!
xoxo Kara 💕
Kara Frazier is the founder and CEO of Fighting Pretty. Kara is a 17-year breast cancer survivor (Stage 3, Her2+. ER+, BRCA-) and underwent an explant surgery in 2020 after finding out her Allergan implants were recalled. She is a wife, new mom and stepmom. Kara is on a mission to help all women feel strong and beautiful - while battling cancer or not!
To learn more about Kara's story, click here.